Money and Family; To Give or Not to Give?


This month, I’ll be writing tips for you on how to handle family and friends who either ask to borrow money, or seem to always need help with their money. Before you think I am being cold and just downright mean, you need to stop and consider each situation very carefully. Keep in mind that a bad decision on your part could dramatically affect your own financial future! This week, you’ll receive your first tip, so read on!

Money, is an emotionally charged topic. It’s not that we should immediately say no to family or friends who ask for money, or other forms of financial assistance, it’s that we should have some ground rules in place. We also need to understand the ramifications of our actions. It’s not uncommon for money issues among family and friends to sour relationships.

So, before you say yes and dive in, you need to consider all aspects of lending money. You also need to know whether you can truly afford to extend help.  After all, money is a topic that generates a tremendous amount of stress for all of us. Let’s face it, whether you have too little, or even too much, money causes us stress.

To kick off this month’s topic, the first tip you should keep in mind is that it’s ok to ask questions and to think about whether you want to lend the money. As the lender, you should feel free to pursue your own due diligence so ask away! Go ahead and open dialogue with your family member or friend who has asked for money. After all, they started the conversation by asking you in the first place.


Don’t be shy about hashing out the why, what for, how much, etc. Don’t be general, be specific! Ask what they need the money for, and why they don’t have their own emergency fund. You can and should ask if they have considered a part-time gig, if they have tried a loan, or even peer-to-peer lending. Feel free to say you need time to think about it and don’t let yourself be pressured.

That’s the first tip for this week – open dialogue, ask questions. Check back next week as we continue our discussion about family, friends, and money. We’ll dive into even more tips and guidelines to help you tackle this topic and decide if you can, or should, lend money to someone close to you.

As an independent Certified Financial Planner™, I can help you focus on your finances and make decisions that are comfortable for you. Contact me and let’s get started. #talktometuesday #getstarted #HowIcanHelpYou #GetHelp #Hireaplanner #familymoney #lender #CFPPro #savemoney #borrowmoney